Totally exhausted

Giggle wrote today ...

I'm totally exhausted ... it's been a really long and tiring week - having to prepare for a presentation in the beginning of the week for one of the subject ... then having to complete all the readings for the 2 classes during the week which I'm attending, on top of touching up on the assignment that is due this week.

The week is far from over - a major national event (CCA) is coming up tomorrow and I'm leading worship for it - got to meet for practice in the morning and stay until probably early evening? Then after that got to rush down to the east end for a friend's wedding party. Sunday as usual would be grocery shopping day cum bathe dog, bathe cat, bathe car day =( Thank God this Sunday we are free to attend a church of our choice, otherwise another half a day "gone".

I dread to think about next week too - the piles of monthly Bible reading journals which the girls will be submitting to me on Monday. Marking 22 sets of 1 month's worth of Bible reading and rushing to return to them within a day or 2 so that they can continue to record their readings in the journals ...

Well, I'm not complaining - in fact, I'm more than happy to have so many of them choosing 4 months of Bible Reading project over ministry in church. And I have seen many of them writing very good and reflective thoughts as I marked their journals. It's just that the thought of having a pile of 22 journals to complete marking sounds ... scary!

In fact, I was so exhausted that throughout the CCA hour this afternoon, I just felt half my head splitting. Can't be help, not enough adult-student ratio, so can't leave early to rest =( The weather isn't helpful also - so super hot and super sticky ... grumble, grumble, grumble ...

As I think about my physical failure and limitations, I'm just so thankful that God is not like us human, who gets tired, who are constrained by limitations, etc. In fact, Psalm 121:1-4 echos the continuous watchful eye of the Lord, His constant help available, His unceasing strength which we can depend on "I lift up my eyes to the hills - where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip - he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep."

Aren't you thankful that God is not like human, who fail and get exhausted, or at times temperamental and moody?

I hope I'm still writing sense, not dollars, haha ...

Christians - little Christ?

Giggle wrote today ...

Just some thoughts after attending today's "Day of Prayer" at college ...

When Christians were first called "Christians" in Antioch, the term actually implied "little Christ". I guess there and then, the early apostles and followers of the Lord Jesus really took their faith seriously and lived in accordance to all the teachings of the Lord. They were serious in meeting together constantly, praying together, breaking bread together, and most importantly, studying the Word of God. It seems that no part of their lives were outside the influence of God.

But what has happened in our world today? Are Christians still "little Christ"? As in, do we still model and live our lives so carefully that none of our life is outside the sphere and influence of God's reign? Do we intentionally do so? Sadly, this doesn't seem to be so.

We have many young Christians who are 2nd generation, 3rd generation or even 4th generation Christians - young people who are born into Christian families, who were baptized as babies, who attended Sunday School since the age of 3 or so. I often wonder if they do truly know the meaning of "KNOWING" God - that is, not intellectually, but experientially? Well, let's not just "pinpoint" this group, let's also look at the adults - adults who call ourselves Christians, are we living and acting like Christians?

I lament the fact that as I look around, I often see Christians (young or old) taking God's saving grace for granted - I mean, there are real serious ones who really live and testify for the Lord, sharing His love with others, but there are some who just "spoil the market". Knowledge of God becomes reduced to the intellectual aspect, and experience of God seems to be limited only to Sunday, during church worship, a life "with God" is only contain on Sunday and not the rest of the week. What has happened?

There can be altar calls after altar calls and the same person can respond one time after another - but is that response genuine? I mean, if God has seriously touch your heart and caused you to turn in repentance, will you allow yourselves to fall into the same trap and feel sorry all over again, and repeat the whole vicious cycle countless times through? What then is the meaning of repentance? Little wonder why other religion seemed to be doing so well in their "evangelism" and the Christian circle is not. We are just too complacent, or simply put, we are just too comfortable with our own faith to be shaken out to do something for the Lord - we probably think that since God is so gracious, so good, so kind, and the list goes on ... He will understand our struggles, He will be compassionate about our failures, etc? Isn't it?

I believe that somewhere along the line, you probably have heard comments like this before, "If being a Christian is like what this person is, then I rather not - what's the difference? I think comparatively, I'm much better than he or she who call himself or herself a Christan." I'm "coerced" to agree that this is somewhat true, and I believe this is also why we often fail in our evangelism, perhaps? We focus too much on the "evangelism" (aka the "act" of (one-time) sharing the Gospel with non-believer) itself that our lifestyle don't speak coherently with what we are preaching. When we preach, we act "Christian", excited to share about our faith; but when we don't preach, we act so "unchristian".

Christians - little Christ? Are we truly little "Christ" - or have we cause our Lord to suffer shame because of our selfish ways of life, because we are just not willing to step out of our comfort zone and allow Him to direct it in the way He wants. Or are we scared that He will tell us to do something that we don't like to do - then maybe our understanding of God needs fresh enlightenment. God is not a sadist - He need not save you and me out of eternal condemnation (which costs Him His life!) only to make us "suffer".

Jeremiah 9:23-24 "This is what the LORD says: "Let not the wise man boast of his wisdom or the strong man boast of his strength or the rich man boast of his riches, but let him who boasts boast about this: that he understands and knows me, that I am the LORD, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight," declares the LORD."

Writing letters

Giggle wrote today ...

My lecturer said something this morning during class which got me thinking ... She said nowadays with all the technology availability (SMS, MMS, MSN, emails, and the list just goes on), we no longer take time to write letters - letters that are so personal and that warms the heart of the recipients.

In fact, in biblical times, letter-writing is the only way of corresponding and staying in-touch with one another. There is much worth in letters themselves - just think about it ...

1) During those times, writing material is not cheap, and to pen a letter speaks of your heart's intention, sincerity and love to those you want to correspond to.

2) When we write letters, we need to phrase our words properly so that it carries the meaning of our intention - that requires efforts to think deeply, on the part of the writer, and carefulness in writing as each word is being hand written.

3) There's no such thing as instant connection then, letters are usually courier (not the courier we understand this day such as DHL, or FedEx) by someone travelling on a journey to the destination and it can take days, weeks, or months. Even when postage stamps are invented, sending a letter takes a while too.

So what has happened in our time? We have become such "instantaneous" people that we get impatient when we don't receive immediate replies from those we want to hear, isn't it? Then, we become so used to abbreviations or sms-language that words become so "cheaply substituted" - just because we want to shorten our text, or just because we assume the other party understand what we intend to communicate. Of course, there's the very "impersonal" mode which we choose to use - everything becomes so set in technology (think about it: how much time do you spend in front of all the technical devices and how much time do you spend with people?) Then, because of all the typing we have been doing, we are now unable to write legibly, or perhaps even, having the patience to complete writing what we need to write.

Gone were the days where we look forward to receiving letters from pen-pals of different countries ... gone were the days where we look forward to writing another letter to update our pen-pals the exciting things we want to share with them ... gone were the days where we receive personalized letters, addressed to us, and which warms our hearts ...

Technology is good, but if it takes the "humanness" out from us that we become like these technical devices in our relationship with others or our lifestyle, then I think we need to stop and ponder how to get our "humanness" back. Have we lost our "human touch"? I'll leave you to ponder and reflect ...

On a side note, friends feedback that my posts are very long (haha, may I "argue" that it's also because I chose a normal size font as opposed to those small ones) =P Anyway, this blog is meant to share lessons learn and reflections, and I can't shortchange it by not stating my case before I make my conclusion, can I? =) Therefore, please bear with me, and if you have found this blog encouraging and spurring for you, please feel free to share it with others. Don't worry, no names will be mentioned here, the purpose is NOT to highlight persons, but what God wants to teach us, and what we need to learn.

The rose

Giggle wrote today ...

If you walk with eyes open, looking at the things around you, you will discover many lessons God can teach you through them. I was walking past a florist when I saw all the lovely flowers along its corridor. The red roses somewhat capture my attention (well, I do have soft spot for roses - they're nice, don't you agree?)

Some people commented that you can tell whether a person is an optimist or a pessimist by the way they "define" the rose ... Do they ask why there are thorns on the stalk of rose, or do they give thanks for the thorns on the stalk of rose. It depends on what they see - the pricky thorns, or the beautiful flower itself. If the former, then they are most likely to be a pessimist, if the latter, then they are likely to be an optimist.

I'm not sure if you have come across this song "The rose"? Quite an "old" song - haha, my era one =) but I love the lyrics and the tune of the song. Here it is ...

The rose (by Amanda McBrooomfrom the soundtrack to "The Rose")

sung by Bette Midler

Some say love, it is a river

That drowns the tender reed

Some say love, it is a razor

That leaves your soul to bleed

Some say love, it is a hunger

An endless aching need

I say love, it is a flower

And you its only seed

It's the heart afraid of breaking

That never learns to dance

It's the dream afraid of waking

That never takes the chance

It's the one who won't be taken

Who cannot seem to give

And the soul afraid of dyin'

That never learns to live

When the night has been too lonely

And the road has been too long

And you think that love is only

For the lucky and the strong

Just remember in the winter

Far beneath the bitter snows

Lies the seed that with the sun's love

In the spring becomes the rose.

Although this song is not under the category of "Gospel songs", but I'm very "inspired" by the meaning behind it. In a way, I felt it expresses the fact that although in life there might be hardships along the way, but the sun (God) is there to provide all that the seed needs in order to grow and bloom. And the song also encouraged me not to be afraid of failures, to dream dreams, or to take chances - we only live once, and we really have to depend on God's wisdom so as not to live with regrets.

James 1:2-4 also reminds us to "Consider it pure joy, my brothers (sisters included too =), whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

So if there's trials or hardships - remember the rose, not the thorns. Remember the beauty you can admire, not the pricks you will get.

Feel free to share your comments on this song if you have any. And for those who know me, if you want to hear the song, let me know - I have it, DEFINITELY! =)

Prefect = perfect ... pastors' kids = perfect kids ... ?

Giggle wrote today ...

When someone is given a leadership role, do we expect them to be infallible? It seems that the way our society shapes the beliefs of our young generation these days is that "we must strive for success, and you must succeed".

Yes, it's good to always encourage people to give of their best and to strive for success, but unfortunately, our society don't seem to teach people how to deal with failures, isn't it? Just read about the number of rising cases where young kids are seeking counseling or suffering depression because they felt they had not done well, or at least not up to their parents' expectation - and to a certain extent, they have "failed".

My heart always goes out to some student leaders whom I knew tried their very best yet still made mistakes (unintentionally) while executing their duties. It's very heartbreaking to hear of adults giving critical comments about how can they make such mistakes, why are they selected if there are better ones than them, etc, etc. Shouldn't we show them where they have gone wrong and help them improve, instead of being overly critical? I don't mean we should condone their mistakes but there's a place for teaching and discipline, with LOVE.

Student leaders, or most often called prefects, are not PERFECT - they are still learning and growing too - why have we become so critical that we are like what the Bible describes "seeing the speck in other people's eyes and not noticing the log that is in our own eyes"? (Matt 7:3-5)

In the same way, sometimes we are very "cruel" to our Pastors' children as well, aren't we? Just because they are pastors' kids, we expect them to be prim and proper, to behave well, or to behave in a certain way. I've known of many pastors' kids who just want to be themselves - I mean, they ought to be given the fair chance to grow like other children - so what if there's teenage rebellion, that's a phase all teenagers have to go through and learn for themselves, allowing God to use that phase to shape them too.

Why are we always so critical about how others should behave, and yet not paying attention to how or what sort of model we are setting for them? There's a Chinese saying that goes something like "If the top beam is not straight, the beam at the bottom will be slanted too" (MOV - my own version/paraphrase). If we as adults are so critical about them, how do we expect them to learn graciousness towards others? How do we expect them to grow and pick themselves up on their feet again after they have fallen? A helping hand is what they need, not a snub.

This society has enough of critics, let's raise up more gracious persons ...

Chauvinists

Giggle wrote today ...

Do you think chauvinists still exist in this modern society? To my surprise, after weeks of visitation to some religious sites, my conclusion is "Yes, they do!"

Firstly, there are some institutions that will not give official positions to a particular gender as their leaders, although they don't mind this group helping them or working alongside with them, etc. Then, there are others who simply don't give opportunity at all to this group of people.

Well, maybe I'm a bit extreme, but for lack of better terms, I will call them chauvinists! Hey, what age are we living in, why are people still so conservative??

I believe in the eyes of God, there is no one gender that is better or stronger than the other - each has its own role and each has its own calling that God wants them to fulfill. Well, for the ladies, the Bible does teach on how a woman should behave or conduct herself, and yet at the same time the Bible also affirms men's authority as head of the household. Other parts of Scripture gives a good balance too that while women are encouraged to be submissive, men are to love them as Christ has loved the church - sacrificing Himself for it. So it's a check and balance thing - neither is more superior than the other.

I guess the whole issue here is: what is the center-mark, such that we don't become too conservative and "deprive" or "stifle" someone of their growth because of all the man-made systems, yet on the other hand, keeping tabs such that we don't fall into the other extreme of becoming or acting too superior. Am I making being coherent here?

I do subscribe to the belief that there should be mutual respect on the part of both sexes - neither should overpower or put the other down. And I do subscribe to the fact that man is still the ultimate authority over a woman. I think in the battle of the sexes, it's difficult to really put down in concrete terms how much freedom should be given to the women, how much should they be allowed to speak up, etc.

We need God's wisdom - whether the male or female gender, to know how we should relate to one another, so that in everything we do, we are building each other up, rather than tearing one another down. So whether to speak or not to speak, to lead or not to lead - all these are secondary issues, the underlying principle should be based on what Scripture teaches, "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing" - 1 Thess 5:11 and "Honor one another above yourselves" - Romans 12:10b.

Let us always be on the lookout that what we do don't stumble or stifle another.